Grocery Shop Like a Boss

I know what you are thinking.  What can be so boss about grocery shopping?  I’m not talking about organized crime or anything. What I mean by boss is, OWN THAT SHIT!  Walk into the store prepared, with a list and plan in hand, and come out strutting like John Travolta.  Because, say it with me, YOU can grocery shop like a boss!

Getting into the right mindset

Some of you may love to grocery shop and some of you may loathe it.  The fact is, we all have to eat but we can’t always eat out at restaurants for every damn meal.  Here are some ideas to ‘get you in the mood’ and prepare you for the task at hand.

• Find one night during the week to sit down and plan your meals.  Do it alone or grab your significant other, a glass of wine, and sit down to discuss.  Take a look at your week.  Are there important events that will have you out late?  Will there be a night that you have wide open to enjoy cooking in the kitchen with a little music and adult beverage?  Once you know what your week looks like, plan your meals to fit your schedule.
• Take inventory of the ingredients you need.  Maybe you still have a few cans of beans in the pantry that you need to use before purchasing more.
• If you are someone who doesn’t plan meals because you never know what you’ll be in the mood for, it’s still best to be prepared.  Having the essentials in your pantry and fridge will save you time and senseless overspending on takeout.

Before you walk out the door

• For the love of all that is holy, eat BEFORE you venture out to the grocery store.  Otherwise, you might end up with more in your cart than what is on your list.  You will end up with bags of chips, cookies, and salty treats in your basket.  And, let’s not forget to count the bag you’ve opened to eat while shopping.  Don’t deny it.  I have been there!  Especially if it’s a weekend, you will also run into free sample bullshit all over the store.  If it’s yummy and healthy, I say eat it!  There’s nothing wrong with a little free food!
• Wear comfortable shoes!  I have worn heels to the grocery store before because I felt like being cute that day.  Bad idea!  One sharp turn into the aisle and down I fell, dropping my container of pistachios.  Nuts went flying everywhere.  You need speed during this time, not something that will slow you down.  If there was only one ciabatta bread left on the counter and PTA mom got it first, that’s on you.  She just came from yoga.  You thought you were going to the club.

Grocery Shop Like a Boss 101

Now that you have your list and plan in place, you are indeed ready!

• buying items in bulk such as dried beans, nuts and seeds, whole grains, and brown rice, will save you money in the long run.  Here is a related post on organizing your pantry and bulk items.
• buy only what you plan to eat.  When you have your list made beforehand and your tummy is full, you won’t go crazy buying more than what you need.
• DON’T avoid the frozen food section entirely.  Frozen fruits and vegetables are harvested at their peak and flash-frozen to seal in nutrients.  So grab that bag of triple berries or corn!
• Shop around the store, not within the isles, unless you absolutely have to.  What you will find on the outskirts of any grocery store is everything you really need.  Produce section, fresh and refrigerated ingredients, and frozen foods are all around the outside of the shopping area.  I get that you DO need some in-isle items, such as light bulbs, pet food, toiletries, and shit tickets.  Grab those things when you need them.
• Take a couple of adorable and environmentally friendly mesh bags for your vegetables.  This will prevent you from having to use plastic bags.
• Know the difference between Best By, Sell By, and Use By dates
  • Best by dates are only recommendations and have zilch to do with safety.  It may serve as a warning that the taste or texture may be off but, it is okay to eat.
  • Sell By dates tell us how long a store will display the item for sale.  The product is still good even a few days (or even weeks) after you bring it home.
  • Use By dates are the only dates you need to worry about.  Of course, I’m a child of the ’70s and it is no wonder I wasn’t ever killed.  My parents would just give it the ol’ sniff test.  If it stunk, it went in the trash.  Don’t do this..haha.  Throw it out if it’s past the “use by” date.

Things to Watch for While Grocery Shopping Like a Boss

Some stores try to pull the wool over your eyes and use tactics that will make you want to buy more.  No, I’m not being paranoid like those people who freak out when they hear a helicopter over their house.  Some of these tricks really are used to get you to buy.  To cut back on all seriousness though, I only list these for humor’s sake.

• They play catchy music in the background to get you to stay longer.  No lie.  You’ll be on your way to the check-out and then, BOOM…” Oh…this is my JAM!”  Next thing you know, you’re going back down the chip aisle until the song is over.
• End caps or ‘end of isles’ are generally where impulse buys are stacked.  That shit ain’t on sale!  It’s the pre-game chip and salsa display.
• Buying pre-chopped vegetables are more expensive than a whole.  If you’re pressed for time, I get it.  But, if you want to save money, brush up on your knife skills because you’re going to need them.
• Flowers and baked items are usually right by the entrance to greet you with wonderful smells!  And, those smells tend to put me in a good mood and a hankerin’ for a mess of doughnuts.  Resist…unless you want a beautiful bouquet for your tabletop or you mean to have a little sugar.  I say go big or go home.

I could go on and on about slow shoppers, reckless shopping cart drivers, and rogue children but, I’ll save that for another post.  The takeaways here are about being in complete control.  Learn it, live it, and love it…because you’re a gangster like that.

Happy shopping!